Matilda Turns Five

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

On Saturday my firstborn will turn five years old.  I know I will blink and this moment will seem like a lifetime ago, but for now, I am reveling in the present instead of the reality that the last five years have flown by unlike any other in my life.

Having children is like having my own, personal time machine that catapults me into the future faster than I could ever imagine.  While the weary days inch by, the memories pile up at lightning speed.

Too quickly, there is a past created by a mountain of moments that hold a piece of my heart forever.

Matilda is turning five.  This feels monumental.  My brain and heart are having a hard time reconciling sentiment and reality.  I let myself get carried away with thinking how soon more milestones will crowd  my maternal memories.

So, what do I do to cement this moment into my own story?  How do I make my mark on this day to let her know, in her own time, how special this phase of life is to our family?  Well, of course, I write her something!

I'm not much of a poet.  I can spew truth for days, lay out my soul for others to read, but when it comes to eloquent speeches I'm often at a loss.

Nevertheless...indulge me.  This isn't for you.  This isn't for anyone but my Matilda.

I pray someday she will read this and see my heart.  In all my mistakes as a human, as a mother, as a friend, I pray she knows in her core how deeply I depend on Jesus for how I raise her.  I hope her bones feel their worth in His eyes alone.

I have faith that through all the ups and downs we will have as mother and daughter that above all she will hold on to the fact that when I met her, I loved her, and nothing will ever change that.

Through the years and forever, I can't wait to get to know her more and more.  My first girl.  My Matilda.


Wonderful You

There are so many parts that make up wonderful you.
Your humor, your beauty, your wit.
You are silly and mischievous, loud and fierce.
You will grow to know these parts of you,
And I hope you let them each shine bright in your own way.
You will develop more parts, some lovely, some challenging.
All parts needing refinement by the grace of our Creator.
But as the world surrounds you, confronts you, inspires you,
Remember this:
Each of us is fearfully made, wonderfully different.
Some people are smarter than you.
Some people are funnier, some prettier,
Some richer or more popular.
But none of them are more you.
No one else is all you.
Only you are you.
You hold your very own wonderful.
Hold it closely, dearly.
Use it well, let it shine.
God made only you to be wonderful you.
And you are greater than the sum of your parts, my darling.
That's what I love most about you.
All of wonderful you.

Happy Fifth Birthday, Matilda Hazel Darling.

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