Girl Talk

It's all about girl talk at the Pardy home these days. That's right - we're having another girl! With this news comes the relief of not having to re-paint any walls, not having to buy any new things that are currently pink or rosy, and above all...the grand relief of simply knowing what we are having!

I could hardly stand the wait. Eighteen and a half long weeks of wondering if I could change the "it" status to "he" or "she" was a long enough wait for me. I know several people who wait until the blessed day to experience the great reveal. They say it is the "surprise of a lifetime" or that it gives you "more motivation to get through labor" to find out what you are having.

Not me, no thank you. I would be bald and anxious if I had to wait that long - having pulled all my hair out at the thought of not being able to plan ahead. Besides, I think that enough surprise comes along with bringing another entirely new human into the world that the more mystery we can take out of it - the better. (Certainly just my opinion, but hey, it's my blog.)

So - when the tech finally spun the screen around so we could see the wiggly black and white blob jerking around in there, we were giddy with excitement to interpret the blurry image into a discernible, cuddly little she-baby. A girl! A sister for Matilda! That means...TWO girls under two! Wow, that's a lot of pink. :)

Of course, with any defining news, I find there is always a twinge of grief towards the loss of the "possibilities". The spark of sadness that "what would life have been like with a son" is very soon to pass, but certainly not to be ignored. Exactly the same as if it had been the other way around...if we had found out it was a boy, then I would have certainly experienced a twinge of "no sister for Matilda yet" along with the additional stress of buying a plethora of blue things! All that to say, it takes a shift in your mind when you find out news that will forever affect your family - and a new perspective that filters your planning, your preparation, and in this case - your parenting.

What will it be like to parent two girls? This is thrilling and terrifying! (As is parenting in general!) But, I am up for the challenge - and the joy!

After all, sugar and spice, and everything nice...that's what little girls are made of! (Right?)

Now, having sat on the news for a week, letting it resonate and totally fill my head and heart with thoughts of girly delight...we are simply beyond thrilled to anticipate the welcoming of a second girl into our family! Of course it never really mattered if it was going to be a boy or girl - we were entirely more focused on the health of the baby than anything else during the ultrasound, and just jubilant to walk away with the news of knowing what to expect. I am happy to report that all is well, and this girl is healthy and growing like a weed! She is also very, VERY busy! The ultrasound tech said she was the squirmiest baby she had ever seen! At one point she said "Okay, your baby is just doing jumping jacks now" as if to already be defiantly mocking the tech's orders. I just laughed and said "Sounds like my daughter!" In fact, they had to call me back in for additional images since this little girl just wasn't holding still for her close-ups.

Looks like we got another wily one on our hands already!

Atta girl.

Bellies, Bellies, Everywhere Bellies

Beware, planet earth is being taken over by pregnant ladies! I swear it is true!

I know that when anything substantial is happening in your life you tend to be acutely aware of those around you experiencing the same thing. Moving, getting a new job, getting engaged or married...any major news comes along and suddenly your whole world is seen in a new light. Well, I must be wearing pregnancy goggles, because I swear there is a pregnant lady every direction I look (and no, I'm not in the waiting room of my doctor's office).

In the last month I've had 3 friends have babies, 2 friends find out they are pregnant, and currently have a couple other friends ready to pop any day now! In fact, one co-worker's wife is in the hospital in labor today, while another co-worker announced he and his wife are due in August! What in the world!?!?

Along with morning sickness, cravings, swollen ankles and more...I would put "Belly Radar" at the top of the list of "what to expect when you're expecting". I feel like I can spot a mama-to-be from 20 yards, with a variety of shapes and sizes leaving me guessing what week she might be and how she compares to my blossoming bump. I'm not ashamed - I know she is doing the same to me - and all with one encouraging glance as if to say "I hear ya - keep going! We can do this! We are awesome!"

The "belly bunch" or "band of bellies" or "belly brigade", if you will (take your pick), is quite the exclusive club, though our membership is expanding rapidly every day (no pun intended). Of course there are various ranks within the club: First Timers, Multiples, Experienced, Home Birthers, etc. There is really no limit to the categorization. I, myself, adhere to a variety of unions: there's the "I don't care how much I gain" guild, the "I'm going to wear these leggings yet again" sorority, the "You bet I'm drinking regular coffee this morning because I know it's okay to have 100 mg of caffeine thank you very much so don't give me that look" society, and others.

Certainly we are in the current age group of when pregnancies most likely occur. It is no surprise when our group of friends married around five years or less start getting the baby bug and everyone begins to speculate who will be next to "drink the water". So, to all the new mamas and mama-to-be's out there...congratulations, hang in there, high five, and throw back another ginger ale! This is the club of a lifetime, with eternal membership and immeasurable benefits.

Proudly a member since 2009...Welcome.

Involuntary Miracles

The biggest change from my first pregnancy to my second is this: I worry less. Maybe I worry less this pregnancy because I am more educated than last time. Maybe I worry less this pregnancy because I know the experience and what can be expected. Maybe I worry less because I already have enough to worry about! Maybe I worry less because I'm tired of taking care of my 1 year old and just more vulnerable to hand over the "control" I think I have in the first place. Nevertheless, I embrace the peace.

I realized this the other night, praying over my baby girl and my growing tummy, praying for my children and their health, growth, wellness, and mostly just free-flowing continual thanks to God for the ridiculous amount of blessings that pass by me unnoticed every minute of my life. This cell triggers this nerve, sending a message to the brain, making it so my child can now climb onto the couch all by herself. Voila! Another miracle. And I'm not sitting there thinking about "Thank you God for those little cells and nerves and brain"...I'm sitting there thinking "Oh my goodness, now my kid can climb on the couch!? Just another way she can damage herself and/or our furniture!" And yet these little physical and tangible miracles involuntarily occur whether I recognize them or not.

But it's not the "not recognizing them" that causes my lack of worry over this pregnancy...just the opposite. It is the very acute recognition that I absolutely have no control over it! I am the vessel - God is the weaver inside the womb. I can feel a gurgle and take a wild guess whether it is a new reflex of little baby fingers, or whether it was that burrito I ate last night...but God knows every tiny little follicle that He is forming on that tiny head that has yet to have ears set in their proper place yet. Unreal.

And while these involuntary miracles are occurring around and within me all day long, I imagine the only thing I can do is to focus my energy on being more tuned in to being thankful for them. So that, one day, maybe a new habit will be formed: an involuntary constant recognition of all the things I have to be thankful for. Then, and only then, can I imagine actually putting aside all of my illusions of control and fully laying down my worries once and for all.

As a mother, we wear "worry" as a badge of honor. "It's our burden. It's our blessing. It's what mothers do." we tell ourselves constantly (and anyone willing to sympathize with us). But, maybe we can change this. I'm finding gratitude is the weapon against many of my foes. When teamed with Christ's love and peace, then fear and worry had better start running - they don't stand a chance. I'm not saying I'll never worry. I can't imagine that day will come until I'm staring Jesus in the face. But until my involuntary gratitude kicks in, I'm trading my worry in for thankfulness...for gratitude...for appreciation of all the little things I never considered before. That is a miracle all in itself.

Thank you, God, for those tiny little cells building that tiny little baby in there. I'm so glad You're in charge.

Big Girls Don't Cry (They Buy Bigger Pants)

What is the statute of limitations on wishing everyone a Happy New Year? Well, I'll admit I haven't blogged in a while - I was on somewhat of a "headache hiatus". This pregnancy struck me with a three-week-plus headache that simply did not allow my brain to function at a capacity I felt willing to subject you to via blogging. Things seem to be looking up, however, as we enter into the second trimester, ready to embrace the promises of "less aches, more energy" that all the books and websites suggest for the next few months.

Another thing I am fully embracing: big girl pants. I am exclusively in maternity outfits now, or at least greatly-modified-regular-wear...and loving it. There are really several advantages to wearing maternity pants, even apart from the comfort. You don't have to worry about "muffin top". You don't have to worry about accidentally leaving your fly down. You don't have to wish you could change into pajama pants all day since that lovely elasti-band is basically just as comfortable anyway. Yup, I'm all for it. I wish normal pants could take a page out of the maternity fashion book and incorporate a spanx-like-smoothing top to all the pants I already own. Am I crazy here? Who's with me?

The other funny thing that I'm noticing "this time around" is people's lack of surprise when it comes to me and my ever-growing-abdomen. That is, when I was pregnant with Matilda I constantly and immediately got the "Oh wow, you are huge" looks, glances, questions, comments, etc. With this one...well, that is just not news. In fact, the most common comment I get these days are "Oh, look at you popped out already - that's right, you do get huge don't you?" or "You got your belly already! You just pop right out, don't you?" It's humorous to say the least. I walk by and people glance at my belly and then nod with a reaffirming "Ah yes, I remember her" with a few "I guess she is pregnant again" looks along the way. I haven't quite figured out the right response other than "Yup, I'm just glad I really am pregnant, otherwise this would be awkward." (Facetious, I know.)

Here we go, second trimester. The belly is out. The pants are on. The countdown continues.